Jesus Christ
by Hippielover459
Summary: PostRevelations, PreFear and Loathing. Spencer Reid as an outlet for his pain, but what is it?


_**Notes:** Okay, we're going to pretend like this is amazing and that you all love it! Ready...GO! Okay, I know. So, I saw the song in a Criminal Minds MV and I love Spencer Reid, so I put the too together. The Song is Jesus Christ by Brand New._

_**Warning:** None that I can think of._

_**Summary:** _Post Revelations, Pre-Fear and Loathing. Spencer Reid has an outlet for his pain, but what is it?

**_Reminder:_** Review please.

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"Reid, you coming with us?" Morgan asked as they were all leaving. He was referring to going out to drink.

"No. I'm just going to go home." Lair, a small voice hissed in his ear as the other members of the BAU team left, leaving him alone.

It was only a few weeks after being tortured by some crazy man named Tobias and he still didn't feel right. He didn't feel himself. He packed up his things and left, only to go to the café a few blocks away.

"We should have pushed Spence to come along." JJ said to the team.

"We can't force him." Gideon responded and the announcer announced the next performer.

And Spencer Reid walked onto the stage with his guitar.

"Is…is that Spencer?" JJ asked in shock.

"I thought he was going home." Hotchner said.

Everyone else in the place was shouting. It appeared that he had done this sort of thing before.

"My team." Spencer said into the microphone as he sat on the stool. "Thinks I'm at home, reading or watching some nerdy television show. I'd be embarrassed if they heard what I'm about to sing.

There was a small noise, and then silence for a few moments. Then he started strumming.

"**Jesus Christ, that's a pretty face  
The kind you'd find on someone I could save  
If they don't put me away  
Well, it'll be a miracle"**

Being tied up to that chair in that lunatics basement made him start believing on God and Jesus Christ. In times of crisis, you'll believe everything.

**Do you believe you're missing out  
That everything good is happening somewhere else?  
But with nobody in your bed  
The night's hard to get through**

He remembered thinking that if he could be anywhere in the world right then, he would rather be there. Even if it's the bloodiest crime scene ever known, he'd rather be there then tied to a chair being beaten.

**And I will die all alone  
And when I arrive I won't know anyone**

He believed the entire time he would die. There was even a time he wished for it, just to make it stop. He sometimes wished the overdose would have killed him. But he kept those thoughts to himself. He didn't need anymore pity.

**Well Jesus Christ, I'm alone again  
So what did you do those three days you were dead?  
Cause this problem's gonna last more than the weekend**.

The problem would last the rest of his life. Not being able to trust someone, the constant fear, the memories. They may never leave him.

**Well Jesus Christ, I'm not scared to die,  
I'm a little bit scared of what comes after  
Do I get the gold chariot?  
Do I float through the ceiling?**

He began wondering what happened when you did die. Was there nothing, just the end, or was there really a Heaven and Hell? Was there anything at all, or just an endless black abyss where time and thought ceased to exist?

**Do I divide and fall apart?  
Cause my bright is too slight to hold back all my dark  
And the ship went down in sight of land  
And at the gates does Thomas ask to see my hands**

He found the irony in this song. The one he created in the most horrible situation he had ever been in. How he almost laughed as the words sprang together, forming lines, verses, in his cloudy mind.

**I know you're coming in the night like a thief  
But I've had some time, O Lord, to hone my lying technique  
I know you think that I'm someone you can trust  
But I'm scared I'll get scared and I swear I'll try to nail you back up**

He felt bad about keeping feeling and secrets, telling lies to the rest of the team. But all his life he never had anyone to tell these things to. It was hard for him to so quickly switch to trusting and warm after being to cold and suspecting his whole life.

**So do you think that we could work out a sign  
So I'll know it's you and that it's over so I won't even try**

He would have welcomed death with open arms if it presented itself to him. But it didn't, so he was stuck living on. But now he was slightly grateful for the new chance.

**I know you're coming for the people like me  
But we all got wood and nails  
And we turn out hate in factories  
We all got wood and nails  
And we turn out hate in factories  
We all got wood and nails  
And we sleep inside of this machine**

The crowd cheered as he stood up. With a last sweeping glance at the crowd, he spotted his team in the left hand corner. A fearful expression crossed his face before Gideon nodded.

And that was all he really needed.

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**Notes:** Review if you liked it.  
And if you didn't?  
Review anyway.


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